Music According To Castiel
by family-and-free-will
Summary: There's a reason angels don't listen to music.


**I always wondered what it would be like when Castiel discovered modern music. **

* * *

"My turn to pick the music." Dean announced, throwing himself into the front seat of the Impala, after finishing a hunt.

"Come on Dean, you always pick the music. Let me have a turn." Sam complained, stretching his overgrown moose legs out in the front seat.

"Sorry little brother, no dice. When you stop listening to that pop crap, _then _you can man the radio."

Sam groaned. "It's not crap. Your music isn't even from this _century."_

_"_This century sucks anyway!"

"No it doesn't."

"Name one thing that makes the twenty first century better."

"Apple products. Starbucks. Justin Bieber."

"Dude, could you be anymore gay?"

"At least i'm not you and Cas." Sam teased.

"We aren't..!"

There was the sound of wings flapping and Castiel appeared in the backseat.

"I heard my name."

Dean slammed on the breaks. "What the hell, Cas!"

"I'm from heaven Dean."

Dean rolled his eyes and Sam tried to hide his laughter. _They were so gay._

_"_What do you need Dean?"

"Nothing. I was just teaching Sammy here universal rule of life: Driver picks the music. Shotgun shuts his cake hole."

"Oh." The angel shifted in the backseat, uncomfortably.

"Cas do you like music?" Sam asked from the front seat. "Why don't you pick?"

"But Dean said..."

"Dean said that _shotgun_ has to shut his cake hole. He never said anything about the man in the backseat." Sam smirked.

Dean groaned. "Fine. Alright feathers, whats your poison?"

"Well, I haven't listened to anything in a while. Do you still have Mozart?"

Both Winchester's looked horrified.

"Dude, that is _so _eighteenth century."

"I know. What's wrong with that?" the angel shrugged.

"So you've never heard _Metallica_?"

"Justin Bieber?"

"AC/DC?"

"Beyonce?"

"Led Zeppelin?"

"One Direction?"

Castiel just shook his head.

Sam face palmed, ashamed.

"That's it. Cas, we are going to give you a musical education. I'll even let Sam choose, just so you can hear how crappy it is compared to the classics." Dean decided, putting a cassette in. The car was immediately filled with the sound of drums and and heavy guitar. Metallica. _Peachy. _Sam thought, moping.

Dean just grinned and sang very loudly with the song.

_"Eeeeexit light!_

_ Eeeeenter night! _

_Taaaaake my hand_

_We're off to never never land"_

"So what did you think?" Dean asked, when the song finished.

Castiel pondered this for a moment before answering. "So there's a child, and he's praying for the Lord to protect him while he sleeps. But there's a sandman in his closet that wants to take him to never never land. Isn't that the plot of Peter Pan?"

Sam burst out laughing and Dean glared at him, before wordlessly handing over the music case to him.

"Is that correct?"

"No." Dean replied shortly.

"It's okay Cas. Everyone has their own opinion." Sam assured him before starting a new song.

A youthful voice began to sing and Dean cringed.

_"And I was like... baby, baby, baby ohhhhh! Like Baby, baby, baby nooooo! Like baby, baby, baby ohhhh! I thought you'd always be mine."_

When the song finished, Dean unplugged his ears and flipped his brother the bird. Sam gave him his best bitch face and smiled at Castiel. "How was it?"

Castiel returned the smile awkwardly, eyes wary. "Basically, it's about this girl, probably a teenager by the sound of her voice. She just broke up with her significant other at the age of thirteen, she was heartbroken and she couldn't figure out what had gone wrong with their relationship. My guess is that her 'baby' was tired of the girls enlarged ego."

"Dude, that was perfect." Dean applauded clapping his hands. Sam's face turned three different shades of 'bitch please,' and handed him the cassette case.

_"Cause i'm back,_

_Yes i'm backkkk_

_Well i'm back_

_Yes i'm back! _

_Well i'm bahaahaack! _

_Well I'm back in black. _

_Yes i'm baack in blaack!"_

Dean grinned and tapped the steering wheel to the beat. "Don't tell me you don't like AC/DC, Cas."

"No, I enjoyed it. I'm just confused. Where is he coming back from? And why does he feel the need to come back in black? Is he a demon?"

Sam howled in laughter. "Sorry Dean. Looks like we're gonna have to gank them."

Dean scowled. _He was never going to be able to listen to AC/DC again without thinking of the image Cas had planted in his brain. Damn angels and their deductions._

Sam started the next track still laughing hysterically.

_"Cause if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it _

_If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it_

_Don't be mad once you see that he want it_

_If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it_

_Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh_

_Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh"_

Dean smashed his head repeatedly against the steering wheel. _Maybe if I hit my head hard enough, i'll die. _

"What did you think, Cas?"

"This women is high maintenance. That is all."

Both Winchester's grinned.

"Ding ding ding! We have a winner."

Castiel smiled, glad to finally have an answer that pleased both of the brothers.

"My turn." Dean pulled out the next cassette. Sam glanced at the cover. "Not too bad."

_"And as we wind on down the road_

_Our shadows taller than our soul_

_There walks a lady we all knooow_

_Who shines white light and wants to show_

_How everything still turns to gold_

_And if you listen very hard_

_The tune will come to you at last_

_When all are one and one is all_

_To be a rock and not to rooooooooooll"_

"And she's buying a stairway to heaven." Castiel finished the song before it ended.

"You've heard it before?"

The angel shook his head. "No. It is just the best way to describe the song. The song is about a women who believes she has everything, and leads a very materialistic life. She lacks spirituality, so her stairway to heaven is made up of nothing but false promises. It seems like a reasonable conclusion that the artists who wrote this song were drawing parallels to their own lives, wondering if they were on a similar path." Castiel finished.

The brothers were speechless.

"That's deep."

"It is the truth."

"How do you know that?"

"I'm an angel you ass." Castiel smirked.

"Right. Cosmic awareness and all that. Gotcha." Sam remembered, putting the last disc in.

_"Baby you light up my world like nobody else,_

_The way you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed, _

_But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell,_

_You don't know,_

_Oh oh_

_You don't know your beautiful,_

_Oh oh_

_That's what makes you beautiful"_

By the end of the song both Castiel and Dean looked like they wanted to jump out the window.

"What angelic, philosophical meaning did you take from that, Cas?"

The angel looked confused. "I don't understand. They are saying that the fact that you don't know your beautiful, makes you beautiful. And they are trying to get you to see that you are in fact, beautiful. But once you see that your beautiful...he's not gonna think your beautiful anymore. The artist is essentially setting you up for failure."

Dean had never laughed so hard in his life. Sam invented a new bitch face and glared daggers at Dean.

"Alright, Cas. You've heard our opinion, now tell us: Classic rock or Pop?"

Castiel considered this for a moment, before looking up and smiling.

"Neither. I think I'll just stick to Mozart."

* * *

**Songs mentioned in this fic:**

**Enter Sandman: Metallica **

**Baby: Justin Bieber**

**Back in Black: AC/DC**

**Single Ladies: Beyonce**

**Stairway to Heaven: Led Zeppelin**

**What Makes You Beautiful: One Direction**

**Other artists: Wolfgang Mozart**


End file.
